Posted by: Scott Lee | December 22, 2009

The Lee Brothers – Night before Christmas

Twas the night before Christmas,

 When all through the Senate and House,The evil creatures were stirring, Led by Nancy Pelosi in a low cut scary blouse..

Their stockings were hung, In the rotunda with care, In hopes that St Barry, Soon would be there…

The family minded conservatives, Were home tucking their children into bed, While visions of living in a free country again, Danced in their heads…

Pelosi in her kerchief, And Harry Reid in his cap, Had just sat down to write another bill, More Socialist crap…

 When out on the lawn There rose such a clatter, Pelosi and Reid jumped up from the table To see what was the matter…

Outside of the Capitol, They flew like a flash, Harry and Nancy slipped on the ice, And busted their ass…

The moon on the breast, Of a new fallen snow, Gave a luster of mid-day, To objects below…

And to their wondering eyes, What should appear, But St Barry himself, A red and white suit he did wear…

They cried out in horror, “St Barry, why you wearing that suit? How else can I walk into every house in America, And make off with their loot?

 More rapid than Eagles, His Comrades they came, And he whistled and shouted, And called them by name…

 Now Rhambo, Now Biden, Now Warner and Franks, On Webb and Snowe ! What a big band of skanks,

To the top of every porch, To the top of every wall, Now dash away, dash away, Capitalism shall fall!

And like leaves before, The wild hurricane fly, When they meet with an obstacle, Mount to the sky…

 Out to the houses, The comrades they flew, With their laws and their rules, And St Barry too…

And as America was sleeping, I heard on my porch, The prying open of my front door, their footsteps on my floor…

 As I drew in my head And was turning around Up the staircase came St Barry, He Came with a bound…

He was dressed in red and white fur, With brass rings on his hat, He looked like a pimp, And he stepped on my cat…

A big black satchel Was hung over his back and as quick as he entered the room, he was loading up all of my crap…

I asked him what the hell, He replied with a frown, Now I told you during the campaign, Im spreading your stuff all over town…

His eyes how they twinkled, To be truthful, they were scary, His cheeks were like roses, And his nose like a cherry…

His drooling little mouth Was drawn up like a bow And the hair on his temples Was beginning to turn as white as snow…

The stump of MY pipe. He held tight in his teeth, And the smoke of my tobacco, Encircled his pimp hat like a wreath…

He was quite a bit skinnier, Than he looked on TV, And I laughed when I saw him, Until I realized who he actually be…

 A wink of his eye, And a twist of his head, Plus 100 Secret Service agents around him, I knew if I moved I’d be dead…

 He spoke no more words, And went straight to work, As he filled that black bag, Saw my picture of Bush and yelled, “JERK”…

And shoving his finger, Right up in his nose, I gotta tell you, Man, that was gross…

Out the door to the porch, To his comrades he gave a whistle, Out of my garage they came, With everything including my pistol…

They sprang to their limos, Off to my neighbors they flew, I knew they would rob him, Anyone who works will get screwed…

And I heard him exclaim As they drove out of sight, Bah humbug my Comrades, To your capitalism, good night…

I know….PUKE!


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